A few days ago I watched a TedX talk by Cece Olisa. She talked about her life through school, of wanting to be on Broadway, acting and sharing her life with the world and how she was told no because of her body. How she had all the confidence in the world as a child and that confidence was shattered by one teacher she looked up to. She also listed 4 ways to gain confidence. You can watch the video down below at the end of this post to hear her story.
Right now, I want to share my story of confidence. My confidence is…shaky. Most days are bright and planned out. Some days are adventurous and enlightening. Rare days are dark and gloomy; unsure, unknown, unaware.
I wish I could eliminate those rare days but they are a part of life. It’s something I can’t get rid of no matter how hard I try so how do I deal with them?
I try my best to find the reason I’m having a bad day or I let them come as they are. I accept them and wait until my mood picks up so that I can move on.
Accepting a bad day for what it is isn’t easy for a lot of people and I still struggle with it from time to time. However, allowing bad days to just happen…sometimes it works out for the best.
Life sometimes just sucks
Just the other day I woke up and said literally 30 different affirmations of positivity, self love and influence.
Before I could even get my work day started, everything was against me. I was telling myself that I would still have a great day; that I would get my work done, exercise, all that Jazz. But life decided different. I barely got any work done, didn’t exercise, didn’t eat right, my mood kept going down and down. I felt the little black hole of depression creeping up on me. To make matters worse, I began to miss my grandmother severely, wishing she was still here with me.
Halfway through the day I just accepted that this isn’t a good day for me but I wasn’t going to keep trying to fight against the forces of nature. I let it happen. Yes, I got frustrated, I cried a little. I complained and fussed. But the next day I woke up with a smile, thought of what I am grateful for, said a prayer, and took the day by its horns and accomplished what I set my mind to.
Let the bad days happen as they maylife sometimes decides you can't have a great or even an okay day. Sometimes it just needs a bad day Click To Tweet
So yeah, life sometimes decides you can’t have a great or even an okay day. Sometimes it just needs a bad day.
Now, I want to share with you 5 ways to gain confidence so when you’re not having such a good day, you have these little things to help you along the way.
5 ways to gain confidence
I mentioned in this post that I love having a strong relationship with God. He is my reason for living. My relationship is sometimes as rocky as my confidence is but whenever I do go to Him, I’m always feeling better. I also love to journal. Writing down my thoughts and feelings for the day, no matter how big or small, helps me with my confidence. I can go back to a journal where life seemed impossible, where I thought I couldn’t continue something and realize “I’m here now. I kept going and I’m fine”. Those moments really help me out.
It’s such a simple gesture but how often are we smiling? Smile at a stranger, smile at a child. Smile at your pet. Try smiling to yourself. Hell, smile at nothing. It may feel ridiculous if you just tried to smile for no reason but trust me, when it’s necessary, it’s necessary. There’s a really silly meme that’s been around for a while that makes me smile every single time, you can check it out here. Let me know if you just smiled.
Do something you enjoy and something you’re good at.
This can be simple or investing. If you don’t know what you’re good at, think about what you enjoy doing. I promise you’re good at whatever you enjoy. Do you like to cook? Make yourself a meal and savor how well it tastes. Is reading a good fantasy novel your thing? I bet you can read the whole book in a day! That’s great reading!
Eat something sweet(in moderation, of course).
I love to have Reese’s Cups or chocolate donuts around. I keep them in the fridge and eat one whenever I’m feeling frustrated. I’m not a huge fan of chocolate so I know I won’t eat the whole container or too many Reese’s cups. The sweet taste and guilty pleasure of eating something with chocolate boosts my happiness which boosts my confidence.
Mind your tongue.
I cannot stress how much power the mind and tongue has over our lives. What we speak, we believe. What we believe, becomes reality. Speak and think positivity over yourself. Speak it over your life, your family, your friends, finances, school, work, an outfit, over your confidence. Let confidence become a natural part of your life.
Those are my 5 tips for gaining confidence.
Doing them can be scary or weird if you aren’t used to them but with practice and time, you’ll be doing it subconsciously and your confidence will be at levels you couldn’t imagine!
Watch Cece Olisa’s TedX talk below.